As a kid, did you eat all your lollies at once or save a precious few for later? When I was little there was no hope of deferred gratification. But as I got older, I was that kid that saved some “for Ron” (not the guy but the Aussie slang for “later on”).

I was reminded of this as I floated in the sea at Mooloolaba last Monday.
It was an absolutely sublime moment, the sun was shining, the water still. It was so perfect I recorded it. Not on my Iphone, because that would have been ridiculous and dangerous, but in my mind.

I made a picture and mental note to return to this time and feeling the next time my heart races or my brain goes into overwhelm.

In Liane Moriarty’s latest novel, “Apples Never Fall,” she describes one of her characters as “filling her pockets with rocks before she wades out into life.”  This captures beautifully the propensity many of us have for taking our lives too seriously. I’ll admit that I’m guilty of this on occasion. It’s no coincidence that many of my mentees also struggle with the same thing.

So a great technique I recommend is this version of mindfulness; deliberately taking a mental picture of what you see and how you feel so that you can replay it later when you need to “call that feeling in.”

• The brain is designed to keep us safe and so when we attempt any change (even if it is for the better) our default position is to what’s familiar. The good news is that we can, with greater self awareness, rewire our brain for a more effective response to the stresses that trigger them.

• Deliberately slowing down our breathing and calling on a positive, calm memory “interrupts” our emotional mind and calls on the thinking part of the brain.

So the next time you’re tempted to instinctively respond in anger, despair or anxiety – just know that you can override this default system through deliberate focus on your breathing and calling in a recorded moment of calm.

And in doing so you’re saving that precious moment for Ron.